Goodbye, 2011!

I will not be sad to see this year finally come to an end. I believe it has been one of the most difficult years in my life. So many challenges have come my way in the last year that I am looking forward to starting a new year. The bankruptcy has not been the easiest thing to deal with, and while we had hopes that it would relieve us a bit, we are worse off this year than last. With that being said, however, I believe in the end, when we finish paying, and emerge from this long, deep financial fog, we will be stronger, and better for going through it. We now are each working full time, and my husband has taken on a second job just to make ends meet, but it is good to be working hard and trying to do what is right and good. Hopefully, 2012 will bring a little relief, or at least a little bit of respite from the constant worry that we have now become accustomed to. So, to any of you who have been reading my blog entries about filing for bankruptcy, again, my advice would be if at all possible, DO NOT DO IT! If you find that you simply must file, please do so with your eyes wide open and be prepared for an extremely bumpy ride.     Here's to a happier new year!

Dog Training Tips

I have discovered a great place to get information about training your dog. There are videos and blogs and all sorts of cool stuff. I used some of the techniques offered on the site to train my Australian Cattle dog. Great site, visit it if you are interested! The site is called The Dog Training Secret and the address is: www.thedogtrainingsecret.com

Monthly-ish Bankruptcy Update

So another month has gone by and yes, we are still struggling. Even with my increased hours, we are struggling to make our paychecks stretch so that we can pay all our bills. There isn't a week that goes by that I don't worry about having enough money to buy gas for my car or food for the next week. When I look back to when this whole thing started--some seventeen months ago--I think of all the things we should have done, and should have thought about. It literally makes me sick. Once again, if you found this blog because you are looking for non-legal advise about bankruptcy, then I am begging you to consider the things we learned the hard way.

• DO NOT trust everything your lawyer tells you. Be very cautious about what your bankruptcy lawyer tells you. He or she may be the legal expert, but chances are they have never filed for bankruptcy themselves and had to live with the consequences.  
• DO NOT forget that your lawyer is in this business to make a living for him/herself. Many things they say are not necessarily what will truly happen. They often say things they know you want to hear.
• AVOID filing for Chapter 13 bankruptcy if it is at all possible. A Chapter 13 bankruptcy is like being sentenced to serve five years on house arrest. You are allowed to keep your house and your car, but there will be very little money left after the Trustee takes his/her cut. You will be left with only enough money they think is enough to cover your monthly bills. That means if you have any unfortunate turn of events, you will have trouble paying for it. There will be no extras in your life for the next five years. You are free to go to work and come home, but forget about any sort of recreation, restaurant dining or home maintenance or any other "luxury" expense.
• KNOW your finances inside out. If there is any way to avoid filing for bankruptcy, do it! If there is a chance you won't pass the means test for a Chapter 7 bankruptcy, then don't move forward unless there is no other way. Even though a Chapter 7 damages your credit, at least it is a clean break and a chance to move forward. With a Chapter 13, you have to pay for five years before you can even start to recover, and even though you will have paid a percentage of your debts back (unlike a Chapter 7 that wipes debts off the books),  you will still have the bankruptcy showing up on your credit report for at least seven years.
• MAKE SURE you try to negotiate with you creditors before even talking to a lawyer, they may work out a payment plan with you so you can avoid bankruptcy.
• BE PREPARED for some really tough times. Do not be afraid to use food banks and help from friends because you will not qualify for any kind of assistance like the free/reduced lunch programs in schools; you still have to pay your income taxes, you still have to live your life, and that requires money. Be prepared to sell things you never thought you could part with, eat things you never thought you would eat, and ask for things you never dreamed of asking for.
• BE HUMBLE

Living With Consequences of Chapter 13 Bankruptcy

It has been a couple of months since I have written anything about our life after this whole bankruptcy mess, and now I have some more to write. Back when we were first deciding whether or not filing for bankruptcy was what we really wanted/needed to do, our lawyer said, "Just wait, you will feel so relieved when you know that every month your bills are being paid by the Trustee. . . " It has been nearly seventeen months since we filed and I have not had a day go by that I was not sick with worry about our money. I can honestly say that we are worse off today than we were one year ago. Our payment plan is so ridiculously high that we are trying to live on $1980.00. We have four children and I have to say that $1900.00 doesn't even cover our utilities and gasoline for our cars so that we can get to work. I have only been able to purchase groceries three times this summer, and every two weeks, right before payday, we invariably run out of food. It is embarrassing to admit this, but we have been getting food from a nearby church's food pantry so that we can eek by each week. I have been forced to sell my furniture (a sectional for $75.00) in order to pay for gasoline to get to work. This whole experience has been nothing like what our attorney led us to believe. We have tried twice to have our payment plan modified so that we can afford food, monthly medication for my husband and one of my daughters, and utilities, but both times we have been denied. Our lawyer seems to be unable to tell us where he is getting the numbers he is throwing out to us, he refuses to go through our schedule I and J line by line so that we can see how our numbers compare to what the Trustee has. He insists that his hands are tied because the Trustee believes we have $3800.00 per month left after our payment to her for our living expenses. I am no math whiz, but I know that $1980.00 does not equal $3800.00. Our attorney cannot seem to come up with an answer for why there is such a discrepancy. He also is unable to tell us exactly why the Trustee objects to our requests. He also has failed to tell us why she took over our mortgage and car payment at the first meeting since we were not in arrears on either payment, and wanted to continue to pay those two items ourselves. There are so many things about this situation that are frustrating. We can't seem to get anywhere with it, and in the meantime, my kids are going to be hungry, meds are not given and we are all dying a slow death.

Seven Years Ago, My Friend Was Found Dead

Seven years ago today, one of my best friends was found dead in her apartment. If she were alive today, she would be forty-nine years old. I wonder what we would be like now.Hopefully, we would still be calling each other to vent, laugh, and wonder about things.  Her life was not easy, but I bet if she would have lived, things would have become much better for her. I miss her and think about her everyday. I wish I could get the answers I am looking for about the mystery surrounding both her life and her death. I will probably keep searching for the truth for a very long time. I am worried that I will forget the important details needed to solve the puzzle of who she really was and why she actually died. I wish I could have one more chance to talk to her. If I could have had that seven years ago, she might still be around. R.I.P., Kaitlyn.

Granny Smith Has to Go

Meet Granny Smith       1974 Ford Ranger XLT

The time has come to let her go. The old gal has served her purpose and we can't keep her here anymore. It makes me sad, but it is just one of those things. Maybe someone will see her here on my blog and want to take her home with them. She still has a lot of life left in her. She still turns a lot of heads and gets a few honks and whistles while ambling by. Yep, Granny Smith has been a great asset to our family, but sadly, she needs to find a place to live where she will be appreciated and pampered. Here she is folks. If you or anyone you know would like this classy piece of work, just drop me a line. Her price is negotiable.

Search for Money for College Continues. . .

My search for any kind of financial assistance for my daughter to attend college continues. She has chosen a state university that really isn't that expensive, if you have the funding. As I have written in a previous blog, my husband and I unfortunately had to file for Chapter 13 Bankruptcy a little over a year ago. One of the questions I asked our lawyer was, would we be able to get a student loan so our daughter can go to college? The lawyer said the bankruptcy probably wouldn't interfere with that. Well, the lawyer, in all his brilliance, was wrong! We cannot acquire any more debt while paying off our previous debt. I totally get that, but if we had filed for a Chapter 7 bankruptcy, we would not be in this situation. We failed the means test for a Chapter 7.
I filled out the required FAFSA forms in hopes that she might qualify for some kind of help. The unfortunate thing is that it appears  my husband and I have a large income. Being a "displaced housewife," I only earn about $4000 a year, but my husband actually has a really decent job. The only problem is that out of each paycheck, money is  taken out directly and sent to the Trustee. We pay a whopping $5595.00 per month to the trustee. That leaves us with a meager $2000.00 per month to feed and clothe our family of six. We have had some unexpected car repair issues  and so in order to save enough money to pay to fix the car, I have not purchased groceries like a normal person would. It saddens me to say that my poor nine year old has gone to bed hungry and gone to school without breakfast on several occasions during the last three months or so. We made many an evening meal of watered down pancakes lately! We are quickly becoming accustomed to meat free/protein free meals around here! My point is, if our true finances were being reflected in the FAFSA forms, I believe my daughter would qualify for some sort of grant or loan. We are still waiting for the "Award Letter" from the school so I don't know for sure where we stand. I am heartsick that because of a terrible economy and some unwise decisions that my husband and I made, our whole family is paying the price--my oldest daughter being the one who is taking the brunt of it. It is just sickening.
In my search for scholarships and financial aid, I came across an appalling article that claims parents who do not pay for their child's college education are bad, selfish, negligent parents. I wish I could get ahold of the dude who wrote that piece! There are plenty of suggestions for paying for college for people who are in normal financial situations. I am all for parents helping their kids pay for at least some of their college. If we could just get our daughter started, by the time she is finished we will have paid our debts in full and have the money available to help her pay for any loans she would get. The problem is just getting someone to take a chance, and loan her the money. I am sure this saga will continue. If you are in a similar situation as I am and you have found my blog looking for answers, I am sorry to say that I have not found any, but if I do, I will certainly post them here. Please check back again for any new things I have found out.