Strange, Strange Things Are Happening

I haven't posted in awhile because I am working on a review of two companies that sell prescription eyeglasses--Zenni Optical and Firmoo. It is taking awhile to gather my information and do my writing, so in the meantime I just wanted to post some of the strange things that are taking place in my world these days. First of all, I am having a sock crisis in my home. None of us has the proper matching socks. The other day I saw my youngest daughter walking around in her sock feet and upon looking closer, I discovered that not only was she wearing mismatched socks, one of them was a knee sock and the other was an anklet. Whaaat? I asked her why and she said she couldn't find a mate to either one so just wore them together. Then when I looked at my other girls' feet, the all also were wearing mismatched socks. I have to admit that I am the one who does most of the laundry around here and there are almost always unmatched socks (my husband's and mine included) at the bottom of the clothes basket. Why is this happening? I can't figure it out. Is the dryer doing something sinister with them? Are the dogs hiding them? I will have to start investigating this soon before all our socks disappear!

The other weird thing going on is the disappearance of the o.b. brand of tampons. Not actually at my house because I haven't had much trouble finding them in our area stores, but apparently in other parts of the country, the applicator-less tampon (which I prefer) has gone missing. There is some sort of conspiracy theory and swirling accusations about the reason this little box of unmentionables has disappeared from  store shelves. There is even talk of black market sales of these things. I checked on ebay yesterday and saw that a bundle of three boxes were at a bid of $94.00. I'm thinking maybe I should buy what I can find here and sell them at a hefty profit! Anyway, I am going to do some more investigating on this phenomenon as well. It will be my Sock and Tampon Project. Until then. . . .

Don't Mess With the Undies!

My mother-in-law is visiting this week. This week is going veerrrryyy slllowwwlllyy! Whenever she is here, I am on edge. I don't know if I should just go about my daily routine, or try to work around her and her needs. She is not an early riser--I am because I have four kids and two dogs to take care of. She eats at different times than I do, and does a lot of sitting around and gazing into space. One thing she always wants to do when she is here is the laundry. Now, I am the first to admit that the idea of having my laundry complete and folded sounds good, but the reality is that I just don't want anyone messing with my family's underwear! Not even my own mother. I just think that the state of a family's underwear is a reflection on how good a mother I am. Here is what I mean: my husband's underwear is gross and very large. Lots of stains and various sizes. I try to handle them as little as possible. My mother-in-law might think this is sign that I am neglecting her little boy. My underwear is various sizes and usually in the best condition of the family. I treasure a good fitting pair of undies and I feel violated if anyone other than me messes with them. She might think that I put my needs before everyone else's. My two oldest daughters have gross underwear. I really don't know how it ends up so ugly. I have special tongs I use to put them in the washer if they look particularly gross on any given laundry day. My next to youngest has underwear that is too small--I haven't had time to really pay attention to her stuff. I'm just glad she is wearing some! My youngest daughter, who will be nine this week, still has some underwear that is size 4 that was handed down from her older sisters. With the new puppy in the house all underwear is subject to being chewed on and some already have little holes in them. I just don't want my mother-in-law to know my struggles with underwear. To avoid her handling any of them, I got up early this morning and gathered everyone's undies and washed them, dried them, and folded them. She will surely ask if she can do some more laundry later in the week, but now I can give her kitchen towels to do if she insists. I don't think she can judge anything by doing those. . . except maybe that I sometimes wait so long to wash my kitchen stuff that I am forced to use Christmas dishtowels in the middle of September.

Laundry Trouble

Okay, so sorry, readers, but you will just have to indulge me on this one. Something has been happening recently that I just have to throw onto the housewife's trash heap. We have a king sized bed. I don't really like the bed for several reasons, but one of the biggest reasons is the stupid sheets. The sheets are so hard to fold! I have never mastered the folding of any size fitted sheet. The corners are just too hard. There is no way to fold them neatly regardless of size, but I digress. The thing that has been honking me off lately is the fitted sheet getting so fire-truckin' tangled in the dryer! It has happened three times now. If I happen to have any other smaller item in the dryer with it, the sheet (doesn't matter which one of the fitted sheets I have) it will force the poor smaller item in to one of the corners and twist and twist and twist. The item doesn't get dry and is wrinkled beyond recognition. I just have had it! It takes twice as long to dry everything because Mr. Smart Alec Fitted Sheet bullies everyone else in the dryer. I don't know what I am going to do. I am at my wits-end. Maybe I will just not use Mr. Fitted Sheet anymore. That will show him who's boss!!!